Embrace the Gift of Thoughtful Listening

When most of us think of a gift, we do not think of active listening or, as I call it, "thoughtful listening." Often times, we take it for granted when someone gives us their undivided time and genuine attention to engage in what is said. As I talk and network with diverse groups, I grasp the magnitude of actively listening to others. Today, in our society, we are hungry for the practice of active listening. Now, I realize what a gift it is to give someone and what a gift it is to ourselves.

Reciprocity in Active Listening

Active listening is a gift of reciprocity. When you actively listen to someone, you are showing the person that their words and experiences matter to you. When exercising the practice, you show empathy and understanding to the speaker. You validate that person.

This act of reciprocity builds trust and strengthens relationships. When people feel heard and understood, they are more likely to reciprocate the same level of attention and respect. Active listening creates positive and effective communication where both parties feel valued and acknowledged.

The newspaper columnist Ronnie Polaneczky demonstrated this gift of active listening to a hurting mother. In a moment when a mother was deeply hurting, Polaneczky suspended judgment and her "right to be right" and gave the mother the space to be heard. When the mother finished, Polaneczky knew she had given this mother a gift, and she received one through the practice of active listening.

Tips To Practice Thoughtful Listening

It is necessary to practice a few techniques to become an effective active listener. Start by eliminating distractions and focusing solely on the speaker. Avoid interrupting or interjecting your thoughts. Wait for the speaker to finish before responding. Suspend your judgment and "right to be right."

These tips can help you through a holiday season that sometimes can be fraught with challenging situations.

Embrace the Gift of Thoughtful Listening

Active listening is a powerful tool that can enhance communication and foster a sense of reciprocity. By actively engaging with the speaker, understanding their message, and providing a safe, judgment-free space, the listener and the speaker can benefit. So, let us embrace the gift of thoughtful listening and create meaningful connections through genuine communication throughout the holiday season.